Bipolar Bob’s BLOGs

April 4, 2007

I’m still here…..

Filed under: Diary, Poker, Watercolors — Bipolar Bob @ 2:43 pm

So sorry I haven’t been posting. I have 14 minutes before my next poker tournament starts on Party Poker so let’s see what I can whip out in the next couple of minutes. Most of my time has been spent on on line free poker tournaments. At least three of them a day. I’m sure I mentioned the win a couple of weeks ago, and last night I made the top 18 on an Absolute game with about 1400 seats. I have only played a few (less than 6) tournaments on Full Tilt. I just seem to blow-up big and soon when on F T. Now that I have been playing much better, I should try this style on F T to see if it is successful over there.

The other big draw on my time the last weeks has been watercolor painting. I have done a couple of good paintings, but don’t know how to finish a couple. They started good, but I was trying to make the trees abstract, and I don’t like them with the heavy detail that will become the gazebo. I did a nice first draft of a sunset picture with a sailboat sillouet. That one is gonna be good, but I’m sure that the other one of the SD Bay Bridge will be much more popular. I need to get…… tournament is starting now, later.

PS i placed about 300 in this one.

March 4, 2007

Poker poker poker

Filed under: Diary, Family, Poker, Watercolors — Bipolar Bob @ 3:54 pm

 So it’s been lots more free rolls on Absolute Poker. My plans for playing real money are now gone because I read the fine print on the 100% bonus. The restrictions on withdrawal of the bonus are much more strict than I expected. It looks like I’ll have to stay in the play money side of this site. So much for that get rich quick scheme. I should just delete Absolute Poker right now.

I have been spending hours watercolor painting too. The foreground of a landscape of Sedona Az is coming along quite nicely. It’s of Bell Rock, I found it in a book I got on a trip to Sedona years ago. There is certainly plenty of red rocks to work on at tomorrows art support group. Then I’m gonna go and see my uncle for a couple of days.

February 20, 2007

Still trippin

Filed under: Bipolar, Diary, Friends, Paranoia, Work — Bipolar Bob @ 12:00 am

I’m feeling like I am in control of things again.  It’s the grandiose thing where I believe that my thoughts and minor actions are having drastic results.  And I haven’t even read “The Secret.”   I really dug “What the Bleep Do We Know” but it all seems like stuff that I’ve heard before.   When I start feeling it like I am now, I either think I’m nuts, or Truman Burbank. 

So since I quit my job there has been two hang-ups on my answering machine.  No caller ID but I know it’s my old boss calling.  I really don’t feel like talking to her at all.  I just tired of solving her every problem.  Granted, I have not been at all productive….. no that’s BS.   I have spent a lot of hours playing poker this weekend, but I tried to get my eye’s checked, got a depakote level blood draw, and got my car serviced.  I’m getting a lot of stuff done.  It use to be I would regret getting home and seeing a message on my answering machine cause it was always her, and she always needed something right away.  I have to take some of the credit for that …. no one want’s to call me.  I have very few friends and I have lost a good one this whole mess.  I felt unappreciated, and then insulted, I had to draw the line and make the cut. 

February 14, 2007

Happy V.D. Everyone

Filed under: Bipolar, Diary, Friends, Rant — Bipolar Bob @ 12:34 pm

Yesterday I went through hell. My friend wanted me to take her to go buy a used car with her. Last time I was her beard for car shopping she gave me 20 bucks. I naturally assumed we were gonna do something similar this time. When we finally sit down with the salesman (and he gives us a moment alone) she says something to the effect that I’m doing this out of the goodness of my heart. I get a knot in my stomach right then. Now not only do I have to deal with the a– hole car salesmen, but now I’m doing it for free. Four hours into the deal they jack the price back up $2000 for an extended warranty that they had previously said was included in the purchase price. She gets mad and says let’s walk. I play the part to it’s fullest and start tossing the f-word around. It’s wasn’t much of an act cause I was tired of the whole situation. I walk out and she doesn’t follow. 2 minutes later the salesman comes out to my car to get me to come back in and I tell him to go to hell. 2 minutes after that, here comes his manager. I have the radio blasting Tom Petty’s “ I won’t stand down.” and I just wave him off. He wants me to turn down the radio, and I start screaming again. He gets the point and walks away. CAR SALESMEN ARE SCUM OF THE EARTH! My friend did her share to piss me off too. At least she had the good sense not to say a word on the drive home. When she calls me today and asks for another ride to the dealership to take delivery of the car, she is gonna get an ear full, and I am not going to do it under any circumstances. I’m gonna ask for 50 bucks for what she put me through yesterday, if she declines, or offers less, I’ll take it, but that will be the LAST time I do anything for her.

After I dropped her off I was trembling and shaking for about 2 hours because it all got me so upset. I’m steaming and make up an invoice for her for all the stuff that I have done for her in the last two weeks. If she balks or haggles with me much at all, I’m gonna tell her off big time. And then ask that she looses my phone number as all she does is call to ask for favors. I have had enough!

Well now it’s the morning after and I have cooled down a bit. Writing this has helped slightly, but if I get any back talk, I still want to cut her off.

February 13, 2007

Slept through Shrink appointment today

Filed under: Diary — Bipolar Bob @ 11:36 am

I wrote it down in like 3 different places but still forgot to set my alarm last night. I woke up at 10:30 AM and about 10 minutes later the phone rings. I had called my shrink last Friday and told him I was a little hypo manic and had a question about the blood draw that he wanted to do today. He called me back first thing Monday (that means 8 AM, which also means I was sound asleep) Well when he called today, I apologized for sleeping through our 10AM appointment and we took care of the typical medication management discussion over the phone. Now I just have to go in Thursday for a blood draw.

Mood is smoothing out

Filed under: Diary, Rant — Bipolar Bob @ 11:23 am

Well my sleep has gotten back to normal, and I’m not so frantic about about this website stuff either. Now that I think that I have Word Press figured out I have calmed down a lot. I still have not taken much of a look at what’s out there already on other BLOGs about Bipolar Disorder. I should take a look at what other BLOGs are doing.

My problem these days is a mild but always ready to flare road rage. If anyone does even the slightest thing that doesn’t conform to my frame of etiquette and driving rules, I go nuts. I don’t blow up at them, but if you are in the car with me you’ll get and ear full of swear words. I just let these idiots drive my heart rate up. I know it’s just because they don’t know any better, or are too busy on the the blackberry or phone. I don’t really mind the ones that are in a hurry and have to cut me off, they will crash into someone soon enough. As long as they don’t hit me, I just try to give them a wide berth and let them go. But if you stick me behind a red light cause you can’t pull into the intersection to get ready for a left turn, you are gonna get the horn. That’s a big one in my neighborhood, lots of traffic and lefts can be tough, so there is a lot of left turn arrows. When you get that arrow, get a move on, it doesn’t last all day. I just wish it wouldn’t effect me so deeply. It’s so petty. I got no place to go. It doesn’t matter if I miss two or three lights on the way to lunch, I’ll eat 5 minutes later. What’s to get upset about. Now that I’m getting better sleep it’s really not as bad, but I keep mutter under my breath filthy obscenities.

February 9, 2007

Check back later

Filed under: Diary, Website — Bipolar Bob @ 6:34 pm

Im new to all this, messing with themes and sidebar widgets

No time to write anything of value , I will probably delete everything before this post as it’s all pretty boring.

Please check back here in a few weeks to see how I’m doing.

Thanks Bipolar Bob

February 3, 2007

I guess I did publish

Filed under: Diary, Website — Bipolar Bob @ 6:01 pm

Was in bed till 3PM today. That was an almost solid ( I was up a few times a few minutes each time) 15 hours. From the reactions and input I got yesterday regarding this website, in addition to a good night sleep, I am now wondering the value added by publishing this diary on the internet. For now I will continue, start up the private BLOG with George, and not publish anything publicly. If it produces something of value, it may be published in the future.

February 1, 2007

Not enough sleep

Filed under: Diary — Bipolar Bob @ 4:01 pm

up till 9:30 AM, asleep till 2:30PM that’s 5 hours.

A bit of incense in the early AM

Filed under: Diary, Poker — Bipolar Bob @ 2:31 am

I just lit a stick of Nag Champa incense. I think I’ll be typing for at least another hour. I did take a break about an hour ago and lost 20K play chips at Full Tilt Poker in about 15 minutes. I have just not had the patients to play poker very seriously for over a week now. I guess hypo manic is not a good mind set to play poker. I will be switching to Party Poker for the next week, see you there. I’m Mr_Smoke on both sites.

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